Did Our Fave Chaos Agent Just Twerk in a Mini-Skirt While Flexing a £32,000 Birkin in Paris? (Of Course She Did)

A certain someone just touched down in Paris for what we can only assume is the most extra girls' trip ever. The 35-year-old starlet, infamous for her antics and questionable decisions, decided to add yet another £32,000 Hermès Birkin to her collection—because, why not? She refers to this latest acquisition as her new baby. Lucky her, right?

But wait, there’s more. She’s also serving looks in a black mini-skirt and vest top, because obviously, it’s a requirement to look stunning while twerking in the bathroom with her gal pals. Totally normal, especially when you have a light brown wig as voluminous as her bank account. Her humble brag? “Difficult when you've got an Ikea flatpack as a backside.” Classic.

They dined on caviar and oysters—gourmet, obviously. Who wouldn’t? But just to keep things extra, they flew in style—private jet, no less. She was flaunting not just the latest Birkin but her huge black Chanel bag as if it were a regular Tuesday. And let’s not forget her Bordeaux Birkin, a gift from a co-star amid some chaotic reality show betrayal. Not that we’re shocked or anything.

Anyway, I’m still waiting for my invite to these girls' trips. No rush.

—Kit